Back at the Ranch

I don't own a television. Ok, I do have one that sits at the foot of my bed, but the coaxial connection is busted, so even though, technically I do own a TV and the previous sentence is a lie, you get the picture. I live with 4 other people, we don't have cable. Once you eliminate cable, there's really no point in getting regular television, so we never even hooked up an antenna -- perhaps one of the best things we've done for ourselves. Basically, other than movies, NO TV!

Without a television you become numb to society, in fact the only news that I receive comes from Austin Henley's blog, which has now become my daily newspaper/sportscenter. I missed out on a lot of pressing news events, hurricanes, assassinations, political scandals and debates, you name it, if Austin didn't cover it I didn't know it happened, which is why this story came as the biggest shocker of all...





The famed Director of Youth Ministry and professor extrordinaire Robert Oglesby Jr. was arrested and now plays a secondary role in some reality show about breaking out of prison...

Seriously though, Prison Break, did that not freak anyone else out. A gay inmate killing people all the time, but looking exactly like the same man that taught me everything that I know about budgets, planning middle school retreats and becoming your secretary's best friend.

If you got to watch the show Prison Break, then you know what I'm talking about. You also know how aggravated I was that they didn't break out this season, or that there wasn't an end to the show. I would have been fine if the whole thing ended with a bang that didn't go the way I wanted it to, but that's just it, it didn't go anywhere at all. No bang, it was absent of banging.

Which is why, if you're like me, you won't be going back to watch it again next year. Beyond the hours of counseling and deja vu that crippled my memory of Robert Oglesby, was the fact that FOX lied to me. You can't call a show "Prison Break" and never "break" -- you should've just called it "Prison" and given me the last 12 hours of my life back. Oh FOX, you'll miss me, you know you will, just ask Major League Baseball and Burger King.